Sunday, August 31, 2008
Saturday, August 30, 2008
Friday, August 29, 2008
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Homonym Humor Plus
1. He who jumps off a bridge in Paris is in Seine .
2. A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.
3. Dijon vu - the same mustard as before. (Loved this one)
4. Practice safe eating - always use condiments.
5. Shotgun wedding: a case of wife or death.
6. A man needs a mistress just to break the monogamy.
7. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
8. Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play.
9. Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
10. Condoms should be used on every conceivable ocassion.
11. Reading while sunbathing makes you well red.
12. When two egoists meet, it's an I for an I.
13. A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two tired.
14. Definition of a will: a dead give away.
15. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
16. In democracy your vote counts. In feudalism your count votes.
17. She was engaged to a boyfriend with a wooden leg but broke it off.
18. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
19. If you don't pay your exorcist, do you get repossessed?
20. With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.
21. When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.
22. The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.
23. You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.
24. Local Area Network in Australia : the LAN down under.
25. Every calendar's days are numbered.
26. A lot of money is tainted - it taint yours and it taint mine.
27. A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.
28. Acupuncture is a jab well done.
29. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.
30. Once you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.
31. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.
32. Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Scaling Monday on Tuesday
1. King of the Road -Roger Miller
2. Tijuana Taxi - Herb Albert
3. Do wacka do -Roger Miller
4. Sugar Sugar - Archies (and I ain't embarrassed about it either!)
5. Dang Me - Roger Miller
6. Taste of Honey - Herb Albert
7. Houston - Dean Martin
8. Photograph - Ringo Starr (I am a lil embarrassed bout this; but it is true... and the truth is superior over rocks, scissors & white paper lies!)
Roger Miller Lyrics
King Of The Road Lyrics
... and then there's Tuesday!
nor do they add up,
so I try to find some humor
as I shake my head and wonder...!??
Monday, August 25, 2008
A Women's Poem
He didn't like the casserole
And he didn't like my cake.
He said my biscuits were too hard...
Not like his mother used to make.
I didn't perk the coffee right
He didn't like the stew,
I didn't mend his socks
The way his mother used to do.
I pondered for an answer,
I was looking for a clue.
Then I turned around and smacked the shit out of him...
Like his mother used to do.
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Drive-in Church?
Saturday, August 23, 2008
Saturday Morning News
Amazing!
After having dug to a depth
of 10 feet last year, New York
scientists found traces of a copper-wire system dating back 100
years, and they came to the conclusion that their ancestors already
had a telephone network more than 100 years ago.
However,
California scientists dug to a depth of 20 feet, and shortly
after,headlines in the LA Times newspaper read: ' California
archaeologists have found traces of 200 year old copper-wire
system and have concluded that their ancestors already had an advanced
high-tech communications network a hundred years earlier than the
New Yorkers.'
One week later, 'The Redneck Rebel Gazette' in Arkansas,reported the following: After digging as deep as 30 feet in a corn field, Bubba Ray Johnson, a self-taught archaeologist, reported that he
found absolutely nothing. Bubba has therefore concluded that 300
years ago, Arkansas had already gone wireless.
Friday, August 22, 2008
Eifel Tower Top View
Thursday, August 21, 2008
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Hump Day
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Monday, August 18, 2008
Scaling Monday
1. Behind Closed Doors - Charlie Rich
2. Lyin Eyes - Eagles
3. A Simple Man - Lobo
4. Nothing Compares to You - Sinead OConner
5. Aint that America - John Cougar Mellencamp
6. Itchy Chicken - Los Straight Jackets
7. New Orleans is Sinking - The Tragically Hip
8. Pick up the Pieces - Average White Band
Holleywood posted McCain and Obama's list on her site which inspired me to post a mock up of what George W may have on his list.
Sunday, August 17, 2008
Going Totally Green
Saturday, August 16, 2008
Saturday Morning Comics
Friday, August 15, 2008
Fantastic Friday
Thursday, August 14, 2008
More Olympic Clicks
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
Monday, August 11, 2008
Utah Arch ...Gone
Scaling Monday
1. Brandy - Looking Glass
2. These Boots are made for Walking - Nancy Sinatra
3. Good Time - Alan Jackson
4. Vogue - Madonna
5. Hoy - Zayra Alvarez
6. Beach Baby - First Class
7. The Star Spangled Banner - With every Olympic gold
8. Olympic Fanfare - Every top of the hour during tv coverage
Sunday, August 10, 2008
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