Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Posted by Hunters Glory at 3:59 PM
Monday, September 29, 2008
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Friday, September 26, 2008
Posted by Hunters Glory at 4:43 PM
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Sunday, September 21, 2008
10.Your blood type has been reclassified as "espresso"
9. Every morning you go for a quick 47 mile jog
8. As soon as California legalized gay marriage, you got engaged to Mr. Coffee
7. Your after-shave? Hazelnut non-dairy creamer
6. You're tapping your leg like Larry Craig in a men's room stall
5. A Starbucks just opened in your basement
4. Your last words before bypass surgery: "Tell Juan Valdez I love him"
3. Average 80 blinks per minute
2. You named your kids "Tall," "Grande," and "Venti"
and the #1 reason: Unable to sleep and you actually watch "The Late Show
2 and 7 were the ones that made me laugh the most~!
Posted by Hunters Glory at 9:26 AM
Saturday, September 20, 2008
Article written by Gordon Keith (above) about Dallas Maverick's Forward Josh Howard's You Tube remarks.
Dallas Maverick Josh Howard is in the news again for disrespecting the national anthem. And so we ponder an e-mail discussion between him and Mavericks owner Mark Cuban.
Let's imagine ...
As your boss and the owner of the Dallas Mavericks (as well as being on Dancing With the Stars and getting pretty far), I hereby order you to draft an apology to Mavericks fans and to all Americans offended by your incredibly unpatriotic and stupid actions caught on camera.
This is Josh Howard, small forward for the Mavericks. I know a lot of people are mad at me for that video where in which I said I don't celebrate the Star Spangled Anthem because I'm black. Nothing could be further from the truth. I celebrate it all the time while I am black. I was just goofing off with a friend while we were high as kites. JK.
That ain't gonna work. You don't need to mention the word "high," even if it does make it funnier. Please be humble and full of contrition. (Like I was when I ALMOST won Dancing With the Stars on NETWORK TELEVISION.)
Dear Maverick fans who make a big deal out of things,
I am sorry that you found it offensive that I didn't look like Jefferson crossing the Delaware when someone was screeching the National Star Banner in the background. I take full responsibility for my friend putting me up to it. I was wrong for him doing it. I know it looked like there were certain substances that we smoked from pot bongs that made us giggly and videotaping. I also know I will probably never get invited on Dancing With the Stars like my owner, Mark Cuban, but who cares?
Much better. Especially the last part which talked about Dancing With the Stars. People love hit shows that they can identify with. Try it one more time with a little more contrition.
Mark (Dancing With the Stars semi-finalist, 2007)
Dear loser fans who aren't as rich as me,
BFD. I have smoked out and disrespected our nation. I am an athlete. Why don't y'all not show up at games if it makes you so mad? You can sit at home on your fat asses and watch shows like Dancing With the Stars . Maybe you will even see my owner on there again.
Perfect! Releasing it now.
Hear Gordon on "The Ticket" KTCK-AM (1310) weekdays from 5:30 to 10 a.m. Catch him on TV on The Gordon Keith Show, Saturdays at 11:35 p.m. on local ABC affiliate, Channel 8.
Posted by Hunters Glory at 9:01 AM
Friday, September 19, 2008
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
What's sexy? Let's start with what isn't: leggings, mens' butt cleavage, Cancún. What gets smart women hot and bothered? Kanye West live, Mad Men, real estate, volcano-surfing . . . this is not my list but I found it fun to skim over.
1. Sexiest building: Beijing's National Aquatics Center
2. Sexiest game: Scrabulous
3. Sexiest cause: Microcredit. Fusty term belies genius concept—small loans to poor, largely female entrepreneurs in the third world.
4. Sexiest It girl: Isla Fisher
5. Sexiest hour on TV: AMC's Mad Men
6. Sexiest lipstick: NARS Belle du Jour, the nudest of them all
7. Sexiest blogger: Boing Boing's Xeni Jardin
8. Sexiest villain: Ryan (B.J. Novak), The Office's coked-out boss
9. Sexiest mogul: Gwen Stefani
10. Sexiest fragrance: Viktor & Rolf Flowerbomb
11. Sexiest download: Santogold by Santogold
12. Sexiest destination: Space
13. Sexiest pick-up line: "See my friend over there? He wants to know if you think I'm cute."
14. Sexiest baby boomer: In Treatment's Gabriel Byrne
15. Sexiest neologism: Staycation—the getaway spent at home
16. Sexiest job: "Cultural attaché" to producer Brian Grazer. Keep the Oscar-winning lifetime learner up to speed on everything from the Japanese mafia to makeup. Salary: $150K.
17. Sexiest party: Democratic National Convention. Donkeys storm Denver, August 25–28.
18. Sexiest offices: Pixar, where animators design their own work spaces. The result: cottages instead of cubicles.
19. Sexiest perk: Summer Fridays
20. Sexiest hair: Christina Ricci's bangin' bob (right)
21. Sexiest weight-loss plan: Red Wine Diet. Drink yourself skinny.
22. Sexiest Bond: Daniel Craig (sorry, Sean!)
23. Sexiest comeback: 3-D movies
24. Sexiest impulse buy: Manolo Blahnik for Thakoon lace-up patent heels
25. Sexiest newlyweds: Nicolas Sarkozy and Carla Bruni
26. Sexiest reality show: Top Chef
27. Sexiest hairstylist: Orlando Pita
28. Sexiest view: Central Park, as seen from Marie Claire's 34th-floor offices
29. Sexiest Republican: Virginia Senator John Warner. An unapologetic party-line-crosser, he's pro-choice, pro–gun control, pro–green energy—and one of Liz Taylor's exes.
30. Sexiest network: SciFi Channel
31. Sexiest fix: Dark chocolate anything
32. Sexiest makeup-bag must: Soap & Glory Sexy MotherPucker lip gloss
33. Sexiest royal: Prince Harry. Gawky redhead doubles as brawny foot soldier in Afghanistan. William who?
34. Sexiest foodie: Giada De Laurentiis
35. Sexiest joyride: Xcelerator, Knott's Berry Farm's 82-mph white-knuckle roller coaster
36. Sexiest bag: Nancy Gonzalez clutch
37. Sexiest website: FunnyorDie.com
38. Sexiest legs: Jet Li
39. Sexiest commute: Paris's self-service Vélib bicycles. Trailblaze for a few euros.
40. Sexiest self-tanner: Prescriptives Good in Bed
41. Sexiest spa: Iceland's Blue Lagoon. Marinate in milky, mineral-rich pools of geothermal goodness.
42. Sexiest splurge: Real estate
43. Sexiest rumor: That Kristin Davis stars in a sex tape
44. Sexiest exhibit: The Story of the Supremes at London's Victoria and Albert Museum, through October 19. Time-travel to an era when "diva" still meant something.
45. Sexiest summer ale: Hefeweizen
46. Sexiest silhouette: Fitted waist
47. Sexiest nation: Cuba. Fidel's out, cell phones and home ownership are in. Let's get this party started!
48. Sexiest posse: Brangelina's spawn
49. Sexiest off-the-grid escape: Tiamo Resort, South Andros, The Bahamas
50. Sexiest shoes: Christian Louboutin stilettos
51. Sexiest handheld: Nokia N96. Super-sleek and begging to be fondled.
52. Sexiest pitchwoman: Kate Walsh for Cadillac
53. Sexiest beach: Maine's pristine Footbridge Beach. No thongs within a hundred-mile radius.
54. Sexiest collectible: Polaroids. The insta-film goes the way of rotary phones by year's end.
55. Sexiest rivalry: Guitar Hero vs. Rock Band
56. Sexiest color: Purple
57. Sexiest offspring: Charlotte Gainsbourg, daughter of the incomparable Serge, and bag-muse Jane Birkin
58. Sexiest stiff drink: Absinthe, now legal in the U.S., minus psychotropic wormwood essence
59. Sexiest before-you-die adventure: Volcano-surfing off Nicaragua's Cerro Negro
60. Sexiest kitchen aid: Ascaso Dream espresso-maker
61. Sexiest newcomer: Atmospheric Disturbances author Rivka Galchen
62. Sexiest dark hero: Michael C. Hall as Showtime's vigilante serial murderer Dexter
63. Sexiest talking head: CNN's Amy Holmes
64. Sexiest lashes: Clinique's Lash Power
65. Sexiest athlete:Diver Justin Wilcock. The hunky Mormon horticulturist who finished dead last in Athens is raring for a comeback.
66. Sexiest workout: Power Plating. Oversize vibrator is killer for your core.
67. Sexiest hotel: Houston's Hotel ZaZa. Bulgari amenities, plasma TVs, and Red Hots at check-in.
68. Sexiest brand: Zipcar
69. Sexiest Democrat: Newark Mayor Cory Booker. Cleaning up one of the nation's most violent cities, and looking fine doing it.
70. Sexiest snack: Greek yogurt
71. Sexiest sport: Tennis
72. Sexiest surprise heartthrob: Robert Downey Jr.
73. Sexiest memoir: Slash, by Guns N' Roses guitarist Slash. (Not that we endorse mother-daughter orgies or getting crabs.)
74. Sexiest ticket: Kanye West's Glow in the Dark tour
75. Sexiest carry-on: Diane von Furstenberg tiger-print pony box bag
76. Sexiest swim: The Raleigh, in Miami
77. Sexiest scene-stealer: SNL's Kristin Wiig
78. Sexiest head of state: Argentine Prez Cristina Fernandez de Kirchner
79. Sexiest packaging: Lanvin's beribboned shoebox
80. Sexiest school: Evergreen State, in Olympia, WA. The trans-fat-free fryer oil powers a local dairy truck. Plus, Simpsons creator Matt Groening is an alum.
81. Sexiest thirst-quencher: POM juice
82. Sexiest trend: Women outearning men
83. Sexiest rain gear: Swims ballerina galoshes
84. Sexiest body: Jessica Biel
85. Sexiest store: London's Dover Street Market PHOTOGRAPH
86. Sexiest excuse: "My Prius is charging."
87. Sexiest key-chain accessory: USB flash drive (like this $170 crystal-studded doozy by Philips & Swarovski)
88. Sexiest label: Balmain, revived by Christophe Decarnin
89. Sexiest artist: Cai Guo-Qiang. His medium: gunpowder.
90. Sexiest office supply: Muji stapler
91. Sexiest watering hole: GoldBar, NYC
92. Sexiest denim: Acne jeans
93. Sexiest wedding gift: Global knives
94. Sexiest status symbol: The sabbatical
95. Sexiest voice: Alan Rickman (yes, even as greasy Snape in Harry Potter)
96. Sexiest guilty pleasure: Penny Vincenzi's soapy read An Absolute Scandal
97. Sexiest polish: CND Nail Gloss
98. Sexiest tourist trap: Carlsbad Caverns, NM. Beyond the fanny packs and souvenir stands are real primordial stalactites, girl, and a flock of 400,000 bats!
And 7 of the Unsexiest…
1. Unsexiest reality show: Flavor of Love
2. Unsexiest thirst-quencher: Contrex "slimming water"
3. Unsexiest workout: Aerobic striptease
4. Unsexiest destination: Cancún
5. Unsexiest trend: Airline bankruptcies
6. Unsexiest key-chain accessory: Drugstore "club cards"
7. Unsexiest divorce: Charlie Sheen and Denise Richards. One recent volley: "I don't want Charlie's prostitute-tranny-infested sperm." Well, there you have it.
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Friday, September 12, 2008
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
Monday, September 8, 2008
Posted by Hunters Glory at 3:59 AM